I’m Good Enough, I’m Smart Enough and Gosh Darn It, People Like Me!

This post is a compilation of everything that has been in my head lately. I know that my posts have been sort of lacking lately, but… I’m back bitches!

******************************

I don’t think of myself as high maintenance, more like no maintenance; however I do expect a certain level of propriety during the following situations:

Subway Riding: All NY’ers know about the courtesy seat left between riders on the subway. If the train car is empty, there is no need to sit next to someone. You are supposed to skip a seat. Why is it then when I have the good fortune of being in an otherwise empty car, I always get someone coming to sit right next to me? I know I look unthreatening next to a bunch of teens making noise, but seriously… save some room for the Holy Spirit; my fat ass needs its own space.
Restroom Usage: Maybe I’m sensitive because of my own past issues in this department, but in public bathrooms, when you are dropping a bomb, please be aware that you need to flush the toilet during the act so that the entire bathroom and hallway outside the bathroom doesn’t smell like the gutter behind our office building.
Morning Behavior: I usually don’t speak in the morning, in fact, I mostly present with a surly demeanor and a scowl on my face. Although, when someone says “good morning” to me, I respond in kind, at the very least acknowledge it with a head nod or something. I’m not trying to have a long drawn-out conversation with you before 9am. So then tell me why when I go out of my way in the morning to say “good morning” to someone, I don’t get the same return courtesy? Yes, I’m looking at you cute book boy from the coffee shop. Be nice…it’s free.

******************************

This past week at work has been a bit stressful. It’s a long story; here is the Cliff’s Notes version (with my comments in parentheses).

[Story Removed]

I actually had to referee a showdown between members of the staff. My whole thought process can be summed up by this:

Personal business does not belong at work. We are not animals; we don’t shit where we eat.

******************************

My agency does not have a dress down Friday policy. I do not recognize this; we work in social service, we should dress down all the time. In the time that I’ve been working here, in my own little rebellious way, I’ve been dressing down and waiting to see how far I can go before I get into trouble. Today’s outfit is brown corduroys and a button-down white shirt from Old Navy.

******************************

As an update...

I am saddened to report that my sister has gone out and bought a pair of Crocs. I know. That's why I'm looking for a new place to live.