Monday, September 29, 2008


So yesterday was my birthday, and I went to my cousin's engagement party, which was really good. The food was awesome and they surprised me with a cake at the end. Really nice of them.

Let me start out by saying that birthdays are really important to me, and it is not about the gifts, but the thoughts behind it.
All day last week Dirty was working a side job with my Dad on some blueprints that needed revisions. He does that sometimes, and especially now that he is out of work, he does it more often.

Of course I was nagging him about my bday and what he was going to do. Little did I know that he was planning a party for me all along.

My sister called me on Thursday night and asked to borrow my car. We made plans to meet after work and go to my apartment to pick up my car. While we were on the train, she told me that she needed to go to the bathroom when we go to my house. Then Dirty called and told me he was making wings for dinner and to ask my sister if she wanted to stay. She was hemming and hawing like she always does, and I had no clue. Anyway, we got to my house and went upstairs. When I opened the door, I saw my whole family and Dirty in my apartment. I was really surprised.

Anyway, he made dinner for everyone by himself. Listen to this menu:
Bruschetta with Tomato and Basil
Mozzarella and Tomato Salad
Mussels with White Wine and Garlic
Linguine with Clam Sauce
Clambake with Lobster, Crab Legs, Shrimp, Potato and Corn
Honey Glazed Ham
Green Beans

The only thing he bought was the ice cream cake that I wanted. Let me tell you, he busted his ass cooking, and everything was delicious. Of course I got tons of presents, all of which I wanted and love, love, love.

The Arugula, Salad Greens and Romaine packs for my Aerogarden
Cash Money- always accepted
Day of Beauty at the Spa- mani/pedi/facial/haircut (I chopped all my hair off again.)
Cooking show DVDs
Underwear and tank tops
and my fave gift of all from Dirty, this toaster oven with convection feature:

I already broke it in. Saturday I made pizza and baked a loaf of bread in it. Awesome!

No engagement ring, and yesterday at the engagement party, there was too much heat on me getting engaged for my birthday. I am fine that it didn't happen, because I would have to sacrifice one of my other gifts. I'm no dummy. :)

Thursday, September 25, 2008

Baby Daddys and Sidekick Gossip... It's Your Lucky Day!

So most of you remember my friend T? Go here and here if you want a refresher. I am happy to say that she has stopped messing with Potato Head once and for all. Why, you ask? Well apparently he got another girl knocked up. She is currently 4 1/2 month pregs. Now for you super duper math majors out there who can add 2 and 2 together, you will notice that he was banging his baby's mama at the same time that he was banging T. Gotta love a douchebag.

Don't feel too bad for T though; during the time she was messing with PH, she started dating another dude, who ironically has an 11 year old son. She is taking it pretty well that she comes second to a kid, but we'll see what happens.

Now on to the greatest story that will ever be told to you in your life. Snuggle up on the couch in your pajamas with a cup of hot cocoa, because it is THAT good. You may even need a cigarette after. (although I don't condone smoking).

Picture it: September 2006. Sloane starts working at the agency. She meets Penny and her supervisor, Sidekick. Sidekick had just gotten engaged and was showing off her pebble to anyone with eyes. Fast forward to February, when she got married. Everything is hunky dory. Penny and I would speculate about certain suspicious comments she made every once and again.

Fast forward to July 2008. Sloane notices that Sidekick is not wearing her wedding rings, and that she has gained a TON of weight. (Now, you may be saying to yourself: But Sloane, how is it possible that she can get any fatter. Trust me, she can.) I bring up the issue of no wedding rings to Penny and she drops the bomb that Sidekick and her husband are getting a divorce.

Who? What? When? Where? Why?. Well, Sidekick got trashed one night and couldn't go home because she had been kicked out and called a friend to pick her up. She told the friend that her husband kicked her out because she was a lesbian. But wait, there's more.

The husband allegedly found Sidekick in bed with her lover. In an extremely compromising position. OK, you dragged it out of me. 69. Not really a position you can play off as not being what it is. He took the rings and kicked her and her girlfriend out of the house. But wait, it gets better.

She moved in with her girlfriend, who is a personal trainer. Now you may be saying: But Sloane, if her girlfriend is a personal trainer why is she so fat? Good question, maybe the gf is a chubby chaser. Who knows.

The best part of the whole story is that this past Monday, a process server came to the office to officially serve her with the divorce papers. Initially I had thought it was paperwork from a case that a disgruntled client was filing against the agency, but no. I walked around the entire building with the security guard and the process server to find her because she was not in her office. I didn't stay when I found her in her SUPERVISORS office, but when I spoke with the security guard after the fact, he told me that her face was priceless. Damn sorry I missed that.

So Sidekick is officially a lesbian. A big fat one.** :)

By the way, I have already booked my tickets to hell. It is seat 8H, first class of course, and it's a window seat. Care to join me? Tickets are going fast!


P.S.: As an FYI, the agency that offered me the job earlier this summer then rescinded? They just posted an ad for the same position. Hmp.

**P.P.S.: Please note that I love the gays. My issue with her is that she is more concerned with appearances than being true to herself, which makes her a miserable, self-hating gay who takes out her self loathing on everyone else. Her wedding was just for show, as is her persona at work.

Thursday, September 18, 2008

Meet My Baby

Yesterday I went and bought my new Nano. I bought the red one again. All of the colors are really nice in person, but a little off. Like they are all metallic-y and maybe a shade too dark or too light. My new Nano is also half the size of my old one, and the screen is larger and so fancy.

I love the fact that if you shake it the song changes; it really works great on the subway where I must have scrolled through 8 different songs. NOT! I must remember to put the hold button on before embarking on my commute.

What I love most of all is the Genius feature. Aw, my Nano takes after it's mom! You click on the Genius feature and it plays songs similar to the one before. No more scrolling through playlists and random songs for my gangsta rap! Awesome. I heart you little red Nano that could.

Now for a rant:

I live in NYC, the greatest city in the world. I am proud of my city. I love that people come here to visit, I do. However, dear tourists, a few tips for you that will be found in no guidebook.
  1. Please refrain from wearing identifying clothing. This included matching hats, t-shirts, etc. If you want to blend in, wear regular clothing. You may as well wear a sign that says "I AM A TOURIST. PLEASE FUCK WITH ME". Because we will.

  2. If you deign to take a subway car, please refrain from commenting on the style, color, make and model. It's the subway, it goes underground with rats and germ infested water. Do you expect club chairs and carpeting? What do you want for 2 dollars in the most expensive city in the world? Also, please note that wrapping your body around the center pole is not any safer that holding it with one hand. You look ridiculous.

  3. Please avoid taking public transportation during rush hour. You and your group of 50 bingo champions wearing matching yellow hats are holding me and my fellow NYC'ers up when you don't understand to GTF out of the way when people get on and off the train.

  4. Please keep your conversations to a dull roar. No one cares that your last visit to NYC was in 1965. Things have changed since then. Why do you think that everyone wears headphones? Because we don't want to hear YOU at 8am. Never did I realize this until the last few days without my I-Pod. It made my heart cry.

So if you are thinking of visiting NYC, print the above out and make a nice little wallet sized card to carry with you at all times.


Monday, September 15, 2008

I Blame Donnie, Jordan, Danny, Joey and Jonathan

I lost my I-Pod. Well, it was taken from me when I least expected it. I listen to it during the day when I have to drown out the whines and complaints of clients and staff. I have a bad habit of leaving it out in the open on my desk. I've been lectured on doing that by so many people, so I can only blame myself.

Friday, I was listening to some old school NKOTB songs (don't judge me!), and left it on my desk when I went to a meeting. Lo and behold, when I came back it was gone. I was more pissed that I had to ride the train without my sound barriers. I don't get emotional about losing my stuff like that. If someone is so hard up that they need to steal my I-Pod, they are welcome to it. I am grateful that I am able to buy another one and that my birthday is coming up, so that I may not need to buy one after all.

So my question is should I stick with the red color or go crazy with another one? Blue would match my phone, but yellow is nice and summery. Thoughts please!

P.S.: I promise I will lock this one up with my bag and listen to music from the computer from now on.

Thursday, September 11, 2008


I am re-posting what I originally wrote to commemorate the anniversary of 9/11. Please remember those people who lost their lives in a senseless act of violence.

Every New Yorker has their own 9/11 story, here is mine. 5 years ago I worked in a hospital, in an outpatient clinic. I was just about to leave for a morning meeting when one of my co-workers started screaming for me, calling me back and into the conference room. She was eating her breakfast in there and was watching television. We both saw the second plane hit the tower, and looked at each other in shock. We just stared at the television thinking it was something out of the movie Independence Day. It was totally surreal.

About an half hour later, we were called by the hospital Chief of Staff and told that the hospital was on lockdown and that all management personnel were needed in the Emergency Room to assist with triage. NYC buses were transporting firefighters, police officers and EMS workers from our ER downtown, and bringing back people that had minor injuries. The most vivid memory I have of that day is that all of the people coming into the ER from the site seemed grey and were covered with soot and debris. Towards the end of the day, the National Guard had set up camp on the hospital grounds and were Medevac-ing severely injured (mostly burned) people from the WTC site.

At this point, I was unable to get in touch with my parents or siblings to let them know that I was ok, just unable to leave the hospital. I tried to get in touch with my cousin and my roommate who both worked close to the towers, my cousin at 120 Broadway, my roommate at One Liberty Plaza. I didn’t find out about either of them until 2 days later, both fine, they found each other and walked uptown together. I was able to leave the hospital at about 11pm, and while traveling home, I couldn’t help but notice how quiet the streets were. Eerily quiet. No cars on the road, hardly any traffic. No hustle and bustle. Just silence.

It was weeks later before I found out definitively of two friends that died, both of whom worked at the WTC. JFQ and PC. You are always missed.

Please go here to to see the list of victims from that day.

Can't believe it has been 7 years already. She says it better than I could have.

Tuesday, September 09, 2008

Wheels are Turning

Dirty is still out of work. Some of the leads he had were not really positions that he could have filled. He is in a weird place; he has a lot of experience and with that was making a top salary. Most of the open positions are entry level architects making less than what I make. (Which we all know is NOTHING) Needless to say, he is freaking out. He is collecting unemployment, but again, it is a very large cut in his income. Which led us here: deep conversations about the future.

I can't say that I'm not disappointed that he hasn't found work yet, especially since my birthday and the holidays are coming up. I have mentioned my fears to him, and we talked about his as well. He feels badly that he is unable to buy me the gift that he wants to get me, and that he is not able to take me to the "fancy" restaurant that he had planned.

I don't really care about that stuff, honestly; but want him to snap out of the depression that he is in. On one hand he is more relaxed and giving now without work, but there is an underlying tension inside him. He feels trapped and I want to help him out... he's letting me little by little, but he has a lot of pride that holds him back. Stuff that we are working on together.

I will say that it is nice to have him be there when I get home from work with a hot meal and freshly folded laundry, and the extra nookie doesn't hurt either. OK, sometimes it does ;)

Thursday, September 04, 2008

If You Are Still Undecided

I found this website today that is extremely illuminating. If you are undecided about who you are going to vote for this year, go here ( )
for a non-partisan breakdown of the candidates and the issues.

I am normally not so outwardly political, but a little extra education never hurt anyone. :)

I'm A Quiz Taking Machine

Your Issue Profile: 80% Obama, 20% McCain

When it comes to the issues, you agree with Obama on almost everything.

Surprised? Probably not. You've had your eye on Obama for a while.

In fact, you're likely already a strong Obama supporter.

You know where your vote is going this November.


Your Job Satisfaction Level: 54%

Your job is about average. There are some parts you really enjoy, and some parts that stress you out.

It's possible that you need a small change. Maybe you should switch companies or positions.

It's also possible that you're simply burned out. No job is perfect, even a great one.

Give yourself a personal day to think about your career goals - and if your current job is helping you achieve them.


Your Job Dissatisfaction Level is 65%

Your job is a total bummer, and probably the worst job you've ever had.

Your co-workers stink. Your boss is a jerk. And your company is probably in trouble.

Think about finding a new job quickly, even if it's just a not-so-great transition job.

You've got to get out of there as quickly as you can!


Your Personality Profile

You are dependable, popular, and observant.

Deep and thoughtful, you are prone to moodiness.

In fact, your emotions tend to influence everything you do.

You are unique, creative, and expressive.

You don't mind waving your freak flag every once and a while.

And lucky for you, most people find your weird ways charming!