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Friday, August 17, 2007

Replacement--Yes, I'm Wearing My Hater Hat!

So today is Penny's last day at work and I am beside myself. I will miss her a lot. It is much easier to work in a hell-hole if you have someone to team up. If it is just you, you look like a difficult employee; if you have a partner, your boss is the one that looks crazy.

But the purpose of this post is to identify Penny's replacement. I don't like her. I know that it is early, and that you will all say that I don't even know her yet, but there are things about her and I consider myself a pretty good judge of character. By the way, based on the information below, I would like to ask for assistance in coming up with a nickname for her.

1. She is like 9 feet tall and still wears 4 inch heels. Maybe this is my short girl complex coming through, but really...do you need your head to touch the ceiling?

2. Yesterday, she had short hair... today it is long and flowing. I know it is either a wig or weave, but one of my pet peeves is the drastic backwards look of hair. Long to short, I'll recognize. Short to long, not so much. At least make it look a little natural.

3. Her first few day here she spent all day surfing the Internet. I waited at least a week before I started handling personal business at work.

But the thing that aggravates me the most about her is:

4. She spells her name wrong. I know that that is her parent's fault for the creative spelling, but really, as a professional adult, ghetto spellings really should be put on the back burner.

Like Dirty says all the time "If you got real hair, real fingernails, if you got a job, you going to school, and y'all need nobody to help you handle your business...Make some noise." She unfortunately can not make some noise.

3 comments:

Lisa Johnson said...

Hey it's Lisa! How are you doing? I LOVE LOVE LOVE your blog background! Where did you get it? It's so cute. Sorry to hear someone great to work with is leaving. That's always hard. Anyways, I was just thinking about ya and wondered how you're doing! :)

Penny Lane said...

Hmmm....i am going to have think about clever names for her.

I am going to miss you and our antics here at work. Holla!

stella said...

Ok, you can't hate her because she's tall! I'm a giraffe myself and I'm a little touchy on the subject. Just ask my husband what happens when he calls me stretch.

The backwards hair issue is stupid. You would think if you were starting a new job, and thinking of having long mermaid hair that you would go ahead and get that taken care of before your first day. I have no cleverness for a nickname suggestion but I will comment you if I'm inspired by anything!