3rd Round TKO

I really feel beat down by stress lately. With all of the shit (no pun intended) that is going down with the crackies, compounded by work bs and personal bs, I feel like running away, and avoiding all my stressors.

Saturday the maintenance crew came to fix my bathroom. Wouldn't you know that the second they got there, I got explosive diarrhea? TMI, I know. I had to call my mom to come pick me up, because I didn't want to reschedule these jokers to fix my bathroom. I was so pissed. Thank goodness Dirty was able to stay and supervise those guys or else I would still be staring at a massive hole. Oh sure, he bitched and moaned about it, but really he did nothing but drink beer and play his PSP, so he had a good day.

I really don't know what is happening with my relationship with Dirty. I feel so apathetic about everything now. We talk about getting married, buying a house and future plans, but that is all that it is. Just talk. I just want to settle some things in my life now. I hate living in 2 places, I hate that I have to buy 2 sets of everything, so that when I stay over his house I can feel comfortable. Most of all, I hate that he doesn't get how difficult it is for me to live such an unorganized life. He's fine. Always. There are bigger issues here, namely that he wants his mother to live with us (post for another day), that I really don't feel have been worked out between us, and I don't know if they will be.

Work sucks as usual. I really want out, but 4 weeks vacation is hard to come by in this business. Honestly, I only do about 3 full days work during the week. I don't take work home, my job is really easy. Comfortable. If my boss wasn't such a pain in my ass, I would love my job.

So that's where my head is at right now. I just want to go home alone and make some macaroni and cheese with hot dogs and curl up on my couch in my PJ's. The End.